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Marilyn Loh. Living life to the fullest :)

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Saturday, September 16, 2006, 2:00 PM

Exam fever for this whole day till next friday.I hope i didnt screw up my prelim papers because i felt that i didnt give my best.It's the first time that i actually screw up my maths p2 and i couldnt do most of the questions.I left the hall feeling dejected and demoralise.Even weiling also agreed that the maths p2 was difficult.Sigh.I asked myself if i didnt prepare or have i not put in enough effort.Whatever it is,I'm still feeling down.Combined humanities paper was alright but hopefully i write down the correct points and my arguement was right.The rest of the papers,i've got no comments.Now i'm left with physics,chemistry and poa.Physics is also 1 of the subject that i'm weak in.Nevertheless,i will still try my best to do it.


I'm back with him after a few heart-to-heart chat.He broke up with his gf not because of me but because of some reasons.I'm really in a confusion whether to commit myself in this r/s.Yes,I do love him like how much i love him last time but it is still difficult for me to put my whole heart to love him again.He also admitted that he knew he hurt me very deeply and he promise to do whatever i want him to do to repay all my sufferings for these 7months.I told him i still did not trust him and i want him to change for the sake of himself.He agreed and just within 1 week,may or maybe he did change.He contact me almost everyday be it when he is in his camp or at home.He will not failed to text me a sms or give me a call.It sort of give me a impression that he did change alittle but i told him it's not enough.He say he will wait for the day that i will trust him wholeheartly.I re-read those messages that he send like "dear i love u so much and miss u too".Never did he send me those kind of msgs.Every now and then,he will text msgs and say he misses me badly whenever he is back in his camp.My heart aches when i read those msg because he's so near to me yet we cant see each other.Maybe you guys might think that those are sweet-talk msgs but i know him too well.If he doesnt contact me means he wont even bother to care about me.Even a call or sms wont appear in my phone.Now when he text msgs to me, i will take half an hr to reply.Well,last time was the reverse.He wont even bother to reply my msg or go M.I.A for a few days.I have thought alot like being with him,i will defintely face parents objection.I'm loss of words.I just want to concentrate on my o's.